Carried

I've been working on the same blog post for like 2 or 3 days... but I guess it just hasn't felt right. (and it isn't this one... it is still sitting in my drafts). Oddly, it isn't anything serious or controversial. It just didn't seem to be coming together. 

SO...

I'm starting over.

Saving that one for another day.

Or never.

Here's the real deal. I've actually had a lot of pretty good days. With the kids. In my heart. Even the weather has been A-Mazing. Not to say, all the circumstances surrounding me have been perfect. 2 of my 3 children have decided to contract some kind of yuck. Their tummies are yuck & they've been low-grade feverish (well low-grade except for 102.8 temp - thank you, Malakai- on Monday night). The laundry is quickly piling up... a nighttime mishap (the 3yr old) & a naptime nightmare (aka- Lilly removed her dirty diaper), in addition to the normal collection of clothes, certainly leave me really wishing I didn't have to cart my laundry out. boo. 

All those things certainly are kind of blah and I've had "my moments" but somehow, the Lord is truly sustaining me. I feel like I've picked up the same toys, the same diapers, the same dishes, a thousand times  but this is where we are right now. I am excited for vacation at the end of July... BEACH! HOLLER! But dreading the fact that my husband will have to work for most of it because he doesn't have enough vacation time to take a week off. He works so hard and not only deserves it but could really use some relaxing time. At this point, I'm not seeing that happen.

It's where we are. 

Doesn't mean my wheels don't spin on how I can make things better. 

BUT...

The Lord is revealing to me more & more the importance of relying on him for everything. Trusting him in ALL things. Trusting him in the midst of my chaos. Allowing him to be my peace. Learning to find the stillness in the storms. He IS faithful. He IS good. He IS trustworthy.

I have so many irrational fears. And even some rational fears. At least according to the flesh. This is what God says...

Then the Lord said to him, "Who has made man's mouth? Who makes him mute or deaf or seeing or blind? Is it not I, the Lord? Now therefore go, and I will be with your mouth & teach you what you shall speak."

Exodus 4:11,12

I was SO encouraged by this! The Lord told this to Moses when he doubted if the people would believe that He was coming on behalf of the LORD. God essentially said, I got your back. I will prove myself. I will be glorified through you.

This week I've been memorizing this scripture:

Such a beautiful encouragement that this world is not our home. 

He is good.

Flesh has nothing on me.

This world has nothing on me.

He is always with me.

He protects me.

Thank you, Jesus.

Let me encourage us with this ...

This life is a journey.

Do your best to enjoy it.

Look up.

Breath in the fresh air.

Walk with him.

When you can't walk any farther,

Trust Him to carry you.